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Wednesday, December 18, 2013

2013 was funny.

This week, someone came into my work, walked up to my desk and said, "You have such beautiful eyes..I bet you make the best biscuits!"  And then walked away.  I was trying to figure out how to work that into a blog when I realized that actually, there have been a lot of funny/awkward moments like that in 2013.  So here's a post on some of those moments.  You're welcome.

-I was walking my puppy yesterday next to a field.  The bushes started moving and there was a lot of what I thought was yelling, so I snatched Gatsby up and sprinted away from what I thought was a man yelling and running towards me...turns out, it was actually a bull.  With horns.  Still terrifying, but somehow better than the predator I made up in my head.

-In February, I was having a little photo adventure with Meg, who was taking some bridal pictures at a park.  I was in my wedding dress.  We were scouting good places and found this cute little porch with a walkway that looked like somewhere people would actually have weddings, so we started taking pictures there.  Then some music started playing and I thought, awh, it's wedding music, what a coincidence.  Then I notice these men lining up in suits that were looking at me a little funny.  Then I realized, this is a wedding, and I am standing at the front of the wedding.  In a wedding dress.

And then Megan and I ran away.  But we did get some really fun pictures. 

-I was at a stoplight by my house when the guy in the car next to me gets out of his car, pulls his pants down, and starts peeing everywhere.  Then he starts waving his ahem around, and pees on my car.  I was on the phone with my mom, and was screaming and laughing (because I laugh when I'm nervous.  A great quality, I know), and when the light turned green, he just got in his car and drove away like it was no big deal.  The best part was that when I got home, I realized my back windows were down, so he heard everything I was saying/screaming about him.

-I was at home sewing by myself and could hear someone walking down the hall knocking on every door and yelling, "maintenance!"  I called my mom and started freaking out because we always get a notice on our door if maintenance needs to come inside.  So they knock on my door, and I look out the peephole to see a man dressed in normal clothes who is definitely not maintenance at my apartment.  I start whisper screaming to my mom that it was not maintenance when the door opened.  I darted outside, in my pajamas, wielding weapons of a fork in one hand and a sewing needle in the other, just in time to see several fireman standing there.  They were there to check the fire extinguishers.  They laughed at me.  A lot.

Note:  My dad has since told me that I have to stop calling my mom when these things happen and I should call the police instead.  Noted. 

-I had a booth for my shop at a Christmas fair, when a man came up and stood next to me very nonchalantly, like the people in movies do when they have top secret information.  "I don't know a lot about Hollywood,"  he muttered from the corner of his mouth.  "But I'm pretty sure you're the gal who played in Spiderman."  I told him I wasn't, but thanks for the compliment.  He told me it wasn't a compliment and that he was pretty sure that's who I was.  He left me with a tip that I should get some big sunglasses to cover my face because that might help.  And then he went back to his tent across the street from mine and proceeded to wave and give me thumbs up all night as if he knew my big secret.

What about you?  What are some of the funniest moments you had in 2013?

MERRY ONE WEEK UNTIL CHRISTMAS!


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12 comments:

  1. A bull? WHAT? Where are you? I need to rescue you.

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  2. This is hilarious! I cracked up throughout the whole thing!

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  3. I couldn't top these! But I must say, you should definitely start calling the po instead of your mom when you get freaked out...like the peeing thing. When you said you noticed your back window was down, I thought you were going to say that he had peed inside your car. That would have been quite terrible.

    Thank you for these hilarious stories!

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  4. I can't stop laughing about the peeing guy!

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  5. I am laughing out loud and scaring jordan ! The peeing guy kills me. That's hilarious.

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  6. Haha this is awesome, thanks for sharing lady!

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  7. HAHAH, I love this so much. Especially the last one. Soooooo good! Also I look out the peephole anytime I hear a knock and totally judge if they are maintenance-y looking or not...hahahah

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  8. haha oh my gosh - that is a lot of weird stuff to happen to you! the spiderman story is my favorite. so funny.
    -- jackie @ jade and oak

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  9. These were all so hilarious! I am laughing so hard! Not to mention all of these things would likely happen to me!

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  10. Ohmygoodness! This is laugh out loud material. :) Thanks for the chuckle!

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