I'm sitting down to a computer for the first time since the day I went into labor, and even though it's only been 12 days, it feels like an eternity has passed between then and now. I now have an eleven-day-old, and my tiny family is now made up of three people (and a fox!) instead of just two.
The day we came home from the hospital, I was so tired, so overwhelmed with love, in so much pain, and just so happy to be home. I had just experienced the most emotional and life-changing three days of my life, and I really, really needed a shower.
If you're wondering what pure bliss is, it's getting to take a shower in your own home when you've just had a baby and spent three days in the hospital. As I stepped into that little slice of heaven, I was struck by how different things were. Just the week before, I would be careful of how hot I let the water get, not wanting to overheat the baby. Now, I turned the water as hot as it would go. My hands instinctively went to my stomach, just as they had for the past 40 weeks, but this time, there was no baby bump. Instead, there were sore, stretched muscles and a living, cooing, snuggling baby right on the other side of the bathroom door.
In a single moment on Thursday morning, I went from holding Jack inside of me to holding him in my arms. Overnight, my life completely changed in the most beautiful way. I've never been so tired, but I've never felt so full of happiness.
Now, I'm sitting down to write-something I've done a thousand times before-but this time, I'm doing it while wearing a baby in a wrap hanging from my shoulders. And that's just something I never imagined myself doing. But let me just tell you-it is perfection.
A year ago, had I seen a sneak peak of my life today, I wouldn't have recognized it one bit. And that's okay. Sometimes you don't know what it is you want or need until it's right in front of you.
Life today is drastically different than it was last year, much different than it was even last month.
And it is absolutely beautiful.