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Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Dear 2016.

Dear 2016, 

I feel like I could make this very simple and just give a quick, "to hell with last year!" and be done...but this: 

and this: 

and this: 

So I can't just write you off as some weird year that kind of sucked (although, I've gotta say, that seems to be the general consensus) and was really painful (even though that's true), because in the midst of everything else, you were the best year of my life. 

Two weeks into you, my life was permanently changed when Jack joined the party. Everything clicked, and my life became complete in a way I didn't know I was waiting on. 

You are the year that made me a mom. And you know, I'm actually pretty good at it. So thank you. 

When I look back at the last 365 days, it's sort of shocking how much can happen in a single year. You were quite the rollercoaster, my friend. But, as I reflect at the close of this chapter, I can see this: 

I am the strongest version of myself that I have ever been. If someone would have made a list and handed it to me and told me, "This is everything you will have to handle this year" I probably would have checked myself in somewhere because there is just no way. But I did it. I handled newborn life and rank lists and uncertainty and match day and moving and intern year and dark times and loss and confusion. I would like to say I did it all with grace and dignity, but alas, not true. Instead, I fought my way through this year. 

I won't sugarcoat it: You sucked. You sucked a lot. But 2016 will always be the year that brought me Jack, the greatest, greatest gift. And because of that, you've earned yourself a spot in the best years category. Lucky break for you, I guess. 

I've never had such a good year, I've never had such an anxiety-ridden year. I've never been more thankful for a year, I've never been more ready to say goodbye to a year. 

So, 2016: Thanks for making us a family. Thanks for being the year that brought us to a new home in a new city where we can settle in. Thanks for working out when you did and thanks for making me stronger when you didn't. 

And now: Goodbye, good riddance, I'm keeping Jack but you can have everything else, I never want to see you again, get out of my life, BOY BYE. 


What did 2016 look like for you?
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